And Charlie Arthur Floyd* Was More Polite

*Cultural reference.

ICYMI: All Your Genetics Are Belong To Us

3,000,000 Siberians Can't Be Wrong

Pffweeeet!!!!
Well, well...Three million minions here at Soylent Siberia. That's only a million less than I had when they banished me here from WordPress. #FuckTheCodeMonkeys!
And though I haven't had any successes like Catalina Robayo-level traffic (30k in a day, 200k in a week) or shut down the Weblog awards, I recently did--single-handedly, I like to believe--avert a global code monkey meddling meltdown with my Lesbian Sexual Identity Google Gambit. Now, some would argue that campaign exhibited far more redeeming social value than all of my previous pawnage of the hyperverse. Yet, even though I pimped in on Teh Twit and Google, my audience is still 60 percent of what it once was. What does that tell me? It tells me I need to find more South American beauty contest hotties baring their beavers--lesbian or not.
Yeah, but for now, you'll have to settle for Aliya Wolf because snooching for naked international beauty contest winners takes time I don't have right now and because, in addition to being horny,  I'm also thirsty...

That will embiggenify...something, BTW.
And now that you're back, thanks for stopping by and contributing to my mission of keeping the unbalanced off-balance. We'll do it again in another eight months, unless things improve or the code monkeys, or the government, shut me down. Either way. Until then, #FuckEmAll and pour me another.

FCC Takes Over The Web, Because #Fairness, They Said...

ICYMI, under the guise of saying it would prevent Comcast and Verizon from giving more bandwidth to "fatcats" and leaving us plebes with baud-rate speeds, then FCC pass it's open internet rules, classifying the net as a utility.
Anyone who doesn't realize where all the bandwidth will now go should just drink the fucking Kool-Aid now. It'll save on bullets.

President Canute: Destroy The Country, Save The Planet

Soylent Green: Just what you need when you're freezing in the dark.

That was the title and tagline to my original blog launched March 4, 2009. Then, as now, I railed against the Carbon Kelptocrats and their patron, God/King Obamandias of the Chicago Carbon Exchange, who I knew would destroy the nation's energy infrastructure with a non-energy policy promising free power generated from unicorn farts and sunbeams.
Now that he has nothing to lose and no support from either party in DC, he is going institute those policies, and make sure we are all fighting for soylent scraps as we are hurled.back into medieval serfdom via a flurry of executive orders. And though it will make energy prices "necessarily skyrocket," and will do absolutely nothing to reduce global temperature or CO2 levels, congress will be unable to stop it.
So drink up, Minnesota, it's going to get even worse.
On the bright side, we won't see the new dystopia ushered in by marauding hordes of machete-wielding juaristas and/or exploding jihadis on the news because the rolling blackouts will keep us, again, in the dark...freezing in the dark.
Then again, there is always the Michael Corleone Protocol--because, global warming or not, it's hard to sign anything after you've been reduced to room temperature.  

Fed Thermageddon Tyrants: Resistance Is Futile

The Borg at FEMA have sent a blackmail note requiring "climate plans" from the states. No compliance, no money. You.Will. Be. Assimilated!

QOTD From Ace FTW

On the disaster that is President Obola's regime...

"This is not a government; this is a corporate PR firm. The PR firm has a smaller child corporation that is tangentially in the business of government, and its chief stock in trade is failure."

Couldn't have said it better myself. No, really, I couldn't.

Racism vs Ebola, Because..You Know

Okay, let's get the awesome art I stole a few months ago out of the way since it is only tangentially relevant...

Now that there are multiple Ebola cases here originating with a traveler from Liberia, it appears that neither President Minderbinder nor the NIH ever thought to restrict travel from countries experiencing an epidemic of a highly infectious, hemorrhagic fever virus with a 70 percent mortality rate. Such restrictions would, of course, be !!!racist!!! because Ebola is an African disease. Even though quarantines and travel restrictions could be put in place to protect the lives of the Africans, South Americans, Asians, Canucks, EUnuchs and, oh yeah, US Citizens already here, it would still be called racist--probably by the Simpleton In Chief himself.

Anyway, that led me to another thought--what about the airlines. After the Lockerbie bombing, Pan Am disappeared under the weight of insurance and wrongful death claims. What is the airlines' exposure (see what I did there) on being a willing fatal disease vector?
Of course, if they were to land their next cargo of contagion in DC instead of Dallas...say in late November during the lame-duck session...they might eliminate the treat of prosecution...not to mention the other diseases festering in that swamp.
UPDATE: With schoolkids being infected and no one being quarantined, our status has been upgraded to #MostlyFucked:

The EPA To Seize Your Assets #BecauseGaia

Yes, the PseudoEco-Nazis at the EPA have decided they will just seize your money rather than wait for some court ruling when they fine you for doing something that threatens their reign over every aspect of your life. And you thought Richard Windsor was bad?

Where's Ted Taylor* when you need him?

This was supposed to go up before the last one.  But #work intervened.
Cultural reference*

Top O' Teh Twit

Yeah, it's a few weeks old, but I didn't steal it from GOODSTUFF until two days ago. Obviously, I'd like him to forward those #EPA emails too.

Anthony Watts: "This time Steven Goddard was right."

"I was so used to Goddard being wrong, I expected it again, but this time Steven Goddard was right and my confirmation bias prevented me from seeing that there was in fact a real issue in the data and that NCDC has dead stations that are reporting data that isn't real: mea culpa"

 (emphasis mine)
Read the whole thing here.

Goddard, aka Tony Heller's, reply.

Must Read: Steven Goddard Outs Himself

After Anthony Watts fucked him over last week without even looking at his data, I guess Steve...er...Tony, had to re-establish his cred. Ballsy way to do it.

And Today In Government...

6-2?!?!? Are You Fucking Kidding Me?

The Supreme Court Jesters voted 6-2 yesterday to allow the EPA to shut down all coal-fired electrical plants because #smog. If that doesn't do it, CO2 will be next. Well, it will be next anyway.Time to move to Texas, because extreme cold kills far more people than extreme heat. 6-fucking 2?

Obama's Posse Almost Came To My Town Yesterday

But they went to the town with the landfill instead...the only "green jobs" around. Guess too many of us still cling to our guns.

"You Are Not Of The Body. You Will Be Absorbed."

Contrary to popular opinion, there will be no contrary to popular opinion.
The American Psychiatric Association now lists above-average creativity and cynicism as mental disorders.
Non-conformity and individuality must be medicated away. There is a 97-percent consensus. Barack Obama cannot tell a lie. 2+2=5.
H/T Chief Nose Wetter

I'd Rather Have An ES-335 Or A Firebird, But...

I might have to get one of these.

Made from the wood the US Customs Department seized in a raid--and then returned, and finished in suitably drab "Government Tan."
Genius.
H/T to Ace's sidebar.

Comment Of The Day

In response to the story at JWF on the IRS going after Hollywood conservatives by asking for the member names of the Friends of Abe group seeking tax-exempt status, commenter Brisco County penned this gem:

 Could they get away with handing over a list of names that included people like Sean Penn, Susan Sarandon and Matt Damon? Would some underling IRS drone know they're really flaming Commies? Could be fun.

A Picture Worth 11,588,500 Words...*

*So far.

Art via Ninety Miles From Tyranny.

Know What's Missing From This Condescending Crap...?

By now you've seen the Bros and Hos Obamacare ads. But let's review--this is how warmly His Wholly Reluctance regards the constituency that must buy into his Healthcare Ponzi Scheme at a minimum 40-percent level for it to even get off the ground. First:

 And demonstrating his similar respect for young women:

But not all women are whores. Some are single moms...and wise Latinas:

But you know who's not depicted in any of these ads...? Thanks right, homies and sistas. Go ahead do a Google image search...nary a black face to be seen, not even in the golf ad.
Obamandias obviously respects blacks so much that he assumes they will do anything he asks--because #Godhood. Either that or they're all eligible for Medicaid. What? Oh yeah...